Friday, April 25, 2014

Well, I have missed almost an entire week of my blog.... I feel like I'm stuck in a fog atm. My eating has went unbridled this week and I could tell by my weigh-in yesterday. My weight was 307 :( I have no reason for it being higher this time other than my strength is wavering. Or I guess more so.... My diligence. I have started snacking a lot again between meals, some healthy, some unhealthy... I still feel I am doing well with my exercise... but I have let my eating slide. *sigh* I am starting to feel kind of depressive, I'm not sure if it's just surrounding stress is making me anxious or what... I do have a lot going on atm... 1. I am trying to plan and save for our trip to PA at the end of May. 2. Seriously hope that we can take our normal trip to Ohio sometime in June. 3. Becoming a devoted fitness instructor. This is a biggie for me. I am VERY self-conscious when leading a class. My body is just not where I want it to be to feel comfortable leading... I can do it, but not "comfortably" and it kinda stresses me...I just don't think I'm mentally or physically ready... also the certification/training process and the time I have to get I done, which I seriously don't think I'll be able to do. 4. Being down on myself for my eating and lack of keeping up with my blog. I EVEN SET MYSELF A REMINDER!! And I still neglect to take the time to do it. 5. My lack of involving God here lately. I have kinda drawn into myself, and here I sit...carrying all this "weight" in my shoulders. :/ I need to refocus, I know that, I'm just not sure how to accomplish that goal atm... Please pray for me. As I have said before, I am a comfort eater, and apparently I have needed some extra comfort this past week because I just ate pretty much whatever. I need quiet time. I think. I need to just sit and be still and give my worries to my Father. Pray that I do that.